Cross Lunarian With Digimon Get Insanity Huh?
by Lunarian
Summary: ABANDONED DUE TO LOW DEMAND
1. It Starts

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WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING

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     The following story/fic/fiction/gobbledegook will contain just about any poor taste in stories there is. We are talking : Mary sues, Self Insertion, Out Of Character, Fourth Wall Infractions, Plot Holes, Cliché's, Random Insanity, Weirdness, Attempts at humor, downright cruelty, possible hilarity, confusion, poor writing, bad grammar, typecasting, wish fulfillment, instantaneous ressurection. 

     We start off in a dark room, the only sounds are a constant click-click of a keyboard typing. Slowly we move closer to the source of the sound, and in the dim darkness, a high backed chair with an occupant can be seen. Along with the typing, the ocassional grunt or snicker can be heard coming from the mysterious figure in the shadows. 

???- " No, no, no... This doesn't make any sense. What was I thinking when I wrote this? " 

     A crack of thunder, and a flash of lightning... his haggard face and scruffy clothing is briefly illuminated before receding back into the dark. Suddenly, he sits up rigid and snaps his fingers. 

???- " Ah hah, I got it. I'll write a story just to torture a digi-destined, just for fun. This ought to cure my writer's block. If not, at least I can reap enjoyment from an innocent chosen's suffering. Bwahahahaha. 

     He claps his hands twice in rapid succession, and the lights go on. We see that the mysterious figure is none other then, Lunarian, a deeply disturbed individual whose thoughts are not quite safe to be had. He is wearing an old pair of blue jeans so old they are gray, a white short sleeved shirt with Marvin the Martian on it, a velcro wristwatch on his right hand, black and white shoes over dirty white socks, and covering his aqua green eyes are silver glasses with horrible focus. A devilishly maniacal grin is spreading across his face from ear to ear, reminicent of the grinch. 

     He tries his best to type out a scenario best to inflict emotional trauma into his victim with. _Let's see... I think I'll use Takeru, and pass him off as a player. Yes... that should work well, have some girls slap him around, then chase him down to puréé his genitals... _

Lunarian- " Alrighty then, time to get cracking. " *Starts Typing* 

***** 

    { One day Takeru was standing around the park. He was a kid. Digidestined type person, so he likes to stand. } _Huh.. What the hell am I writing?_ { Takeru was the school basketball, soccer, hockey, badminton, tennis and foozball captain, he had all the girls after him. He was the cool type, plays them all for snogs and juggles them like fruits. After smoking his cigar, he sat down on the park bench and found himself in his room on his bed. Nxt to heem wuz hiz girl Kari, she had on a deep sea diving suit in the color vivid tangerine. } _What am I smoking to be typing this? Man... I think I'll need to offer some just so the readers can read it._

     { Takeru dont mind, cuz he's a player. So he says to K-girl " Yo girl, lez make out " he says while wigglin his eyebwors all suggestive like. She says back " Oh yes Tee, lets do it ". } _No comment_ { Takeru jumps onto Hikari and they start to kiss, all the sudden the door flies open and there stands Yolie in the doorway. She glares at them and says " Like, how not perfecto, my b/f is cheating on me. ", she then starts to cry large droplets of water about 5 feet by 2 feet and the room begins to flood. " Kari turns to glare at Tk only to see a white dust could as he speeds out of the house in only his underwear with the two ladies in deathly pursuit. } 

***** 

Lunarian- " Hmm, that was different. " 

??- " You psycho! What in the name of cheezwhiz are you doing to digimon!? " 

Lunarian- " Hey, who's there? I thought I was the mystery guy... " 

*Cue Cheezy Music*  Will this story ever make sense?    Will people find this funny?    Will this be flamed into the ninth level of hell?    Who is the new mysterious guy?    Yea find out nxt time. 


	2. There's a Plot?

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WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING

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     The following story/fic/fiction/gobbledegook will contain just about any poor taste in stories there is. We are talking : Mary sues, Self Insertion, Out Of Character, Fourth Wall Infractions, Plot Holes, Cliché's, Random Insanity, Weirdness, Attempts at humor, downright cruelty, possible hilarity, confusion, poor writing, bad grammar, typecasting, wish fulfillment, instantaneous ressurection. 

** The Scene-** A Dark Room ( Not the same as las time ) 

     Silence, a silence so complete that to breath would be ear splitting, in this silence they sit. They sit around a table, sleek and silver, an elongated buisness table. There is a strong air of seriousness permeating the area, all present are here for an important reason, and intend to settle matters quite effectively. Suddenly one of the senior members slams his hands down upon the desk, shattering the peace that so falsely existed, for this is war. 

?- " This can not be allowed to go on, he is ruining the very essence of our world. " 

     A murmuring of agreement spreads rapidly through the sea of figures. Some are shaking in anger, yet others are seemingly terrified of the consequences of this revolution. Even so, they are a united front, and know something must be done. 

??- " He put me in a bright orange diving suit! A diving suit! " 

     Shock now spreads over the assembled group, they did not fully realize jut how bad things were getting. They can now see things have deteriorated much more then previously calculated, especially to have that particular member to so uncharacteristically shriek like that. 

?@?- " It's time we made an example of all those people who seek to play deity in our universe. " 

     Many nod their heads and clench fists. This atrocity affecting their lives is so hated and despised. It is just so unfair, what ever did they do to deserve this cruel fate life has thrown them, thus is the price of being famous heroes. 

?!?- " Our personalities were so horribly warped! I fear that was only the beginning as well... We must find a way to prevent this and teach him a lesson, or our future fate's do not bode well. " 

     They all look on at the former speaker with deep sympathy, they can hardly even imagine the damage being done to his mind from the alterations. Along with the sympathetic looks are more frightened thoughts, _who of us will be next?_

?- " Our connection's specialist is working on the problem as we speak. How's the progress coming along? " 

     All turn their heads to the individual sitting with a laptop in front of him, typing at speeds far exceeding what you would think possible. Immediately after being adressed he stops typing, glances up briefly, then resumes typing while talking. 

?#?- " The data and digital incrementations are proceeding at a pace congruent to that of a 26k modem. It will take awhile before our reinforcements arrive, until that time I'm afraid we will have to try to survive. Sorry Gilligan. " 

     His eyes go wide as he realizes his mistake far too late, everyone hangs on the edge of a balance quietly listening for any sign of recognition. After several moments they all relax, and the previously adressed rounds on the speaker with a swift glare promising pain and torment should he slip again. 

?!?- " You fool! You just as good as gave away our identities, now we have to move faster before we are found out. " 

     Everyone winces and shy's away from the unnatural outburst from their member, more proof of the damages being inflicted to these poor souls. With a single simultaneous nod they all stand up and depart the room, not knowing what horrors await, but with a sense of hope that vengeance will be theirs. 

**The Scene-** Lunarian's Computer Room ( Same As Before, As Last We Left ) 

     Lastly we left Lunarian, he had just heard a mysterious voice from behind him complaining of the destruction his writing is causing.

Lunarian- " Alright, who is that? " *He turns around and looks behind him...nothing* 

??- " Down here you idiot! " 

    Lunarian never is one to take shit from others like that, but feeling content after getting off to such a wonderful start to his story, decided to humor this intrusion. He glanced downwards... and jumped up backwards over his chair, catching his foot hanging to the back, head suspended above the floor by about a foot... swinging back and forth upside down. The being that caused this sudden burst of fright, slowly made its way over to where he was hanging, all the while grinning demonically. 

??- Ohh, so you do remember me, how nice. " *Its voice oozing sarcasm and venom* " Fancy meeting you again, huh... " 

     Lunarian's eyes widen in fear, trying to desperately to free himself to no use. There before him was something he was sure he got rid of long ago... his conscience. Apparently being locked up with titanium chains, bound and gagged with garlic covered bindings, feet shackled with silver manacles, stuffed into a butcher shop's bag, sealed air tight, and paid to be delivered directly over the amazons most pirahna infested river to be air dropped with an anvil tied around the neck... apparently that didn't go over too well with him... because he looked **PISSED AS HELL**

Lunarian- " Ah ah ah ha ha... Hey there little C... Ho ho how ya do do doing...? " *Stuttering in attempt to buy time* -_-; 

Little C- " I'm surprised you bothered to remember my name... when I'm through with you that is all you will remember! " *Screaming In Anger* 

     Finally, Lunarian's logical processes begin to start working again, and he realizes a few things. First of all he is an adult sized individual, not quite out of shape, while Little C is a small 6 inch version of himself wearing white. Secondly he stops struggling long enough to reach up and flip himself around so he is standing again. Now towering over his conscience, Lunarian's earlier confidence and conceitedness returns in full force, and he levels a most formidable sneer at Little C. 

Lunarian- " My oh my, I don't know what I was thinking... To think you had we worried for a minute there. Well well Little C, back for more punishment I see. Let's play some 'guidance golf' shall we? " 

     Lunarian quickly runs over to his closet, opens it up and take out a very hard looking golf club. He looks over at Little C with a maniacal glint in his eyes as he slowly approaches him. Little C begins to put up his hands in defense while slowly backing up. 

Little C- " Ahh now now let's talk about this shall we? " _Why why why did I come back? For that matter why am I the conscience of such a person, this won't end well._ It's time for you to reform and stop terrorizing those innocent's. " _There, I said it... Now what are the odds he'll listen.. _

*Cue Cheezy Music*  
Whatever happened to the bad typing?    Will people find this funny?    Will this be flamed into the ninth level of hell?    Will Lunarian listen to his conscience, and give up his hobby of terror, giving a happy fuzzy ending (Yeah Right)?    Yea find out nxt time. 


	3. A Plot? Well Maybe not

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WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING

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     The following story/fic/fiction/gobbledegook will contain just about any poor taste in stories there is. We are talking : Mary sues, Self Insertion, Out Of Character, Fourth Wall Infractions, Plot Holes, Cliché's, Random Insanity, Weirdness, Attempts at humor, downright cruelty, possible hilarity, confusion, poor writing, bad grammar, typecasting, wish fulfillment, instantaneous ressurection. 

**The Scene-** Lunarian's Computer Room ( Same As Before, As Last We Left ) 

     Lastly we left Lunarian, he had discovered his conscience was back after being disposed off in... less than subtle methods. After an initial startlement, Lunarian recovered and now is ready to deal out more punishment (with a nine-iron, no less). Little C made a last ditch effort to appeal to his charge's compassion..... kinda a waste of breath.

Lunarian- " You must think I'm an idiot or something. What do you think this is some hollywood hacked script play where I will now throw down my club, embrace my gentler side, shed a tear and we all learn a lesson? " *With a soft yet deadly voice* 

Little C- " Ahhh c'mon now man, can't we talk about this? No need to get all.. violent. " *While shooting fearful look at the golfclub* 

    From what we have seen from Lunarian thus far, would you think he would listen? No way, that's right. So Lunarian advances quickly to Little C, kicks him over and applies pressure with the sole of his foot to prevent escape... and pulls the club back. 

Lunarian- " Use your brain this time, and **Don't** come back here, you little annoyance. " *Intimidatingly delivered* "_**FORE!!**_

Little C- " Please Lunarian, have mercy, I just --- wahhhhhhhh. *Little C goes flying out the window, vanishes in the distance in an almost pokémon'ish way.* 

Lunarian- " Hmph, good riddance to bad rubbish. *Condenscendingly* Now to get back to work on my masterpiece hehe. " *Exclaimed in childish glee* 

** The Scene-** An alley-way in another city 

    Little C is sitting on top of a cardboard box, sniffling every now and then. There is a small piece of gauze covering a large bump slowly forming on top of his little head. 

Little C- _Well, that's the end of that.. He will not listen to reason, won't even give me a chance. How is a person's conscience supposed to do his duty when the one assigned to him won't listen..._ *Suddenly he had a shot of insight, a crafty look took on him* _Aha, of course. I saw what he was doing, I will join his enemies and together we will force him to conform, or sweet sweet vengeance..._

    Little C quickly hopped off the box, glowed briefly to heal, and started floating towards the nearest power station. (Conscience's got powers, just can't be used on others, deal with it) 

** The Scene-** Lunarian's Computer Room ( Same As Before, As Last We Left ) 

    Lunarian, that sadistic crackpot artist, is now back in his chair ready to type out torture. _Allright, Takeru, my friend. That was just a warm up, let's see what we can really produce when it's time. _

***** 

    { Tk had just been caught redhanded makin out with Kari by Yolie, but he doesn't care because he's got a loooong list of partners left. So he wz running out of the apartmnt with the girls chasin him, but he dont care cuz he not captain of track for nothing. So he is running out ahad of them but then tripped on a pebble, and fell face first on the pavement. His naked flesh grazed across the sharp stones cutting deep into his body. Face,hands,knees all cut up and bleeding, his left shin punctured by a broken glass bottle, lodging itself inside. } _And thus, Takeru, your torture begins. Bwahahahaha_

     { Tk tried standin up, but was all woozy. He reached down and yanked out the glass shard revealing a cut deep into the bone marrow showin. Then the girls reach, and Kari says " Tk, how could you? Yu said you loved only me! ", wit the righteous fire of anger behibnd her eyez. Tk tries playin it off like nothin " Babe, thers enough of me for everyone ", in a cocky tone. " We are through, over, get your lying butt away from me ", Kari says as she punches Tk in his gut causing him to double over in winded pain. } 

    { Then Yolei walks up and grabs Tks face, brings it up to look into her eyes and says " Same for me you looser!, she then rams his head into the railing then throws him over the side to fall 10 stories onto the pavement below. He lands with a loud *crunch*, every bone in his body instantly breaking and bloody guts sticking out. His life flashes before his eyes, but for some strange reason it's just every time he ever felt pain, and now it was as living it all ovr again. } 

    { There was a bystander who happened to have witnessed the whole ordeal, his name was Bob. He had on blue sweatpants and a greenish grey shirt with the logo 'Class of 2000' on it. His dark black hair was in a perfect short spike, and he had forest green eyes, and the physique of an olympian god. He walkd over to the corpse of Takeru and sat down on his knees next to him. He then uses his spiritual powers to speak to Tk's ghost that was hovering overhead, " Hey sonny, I saw what happened to you, thats a real shame. " } 

    { Tk's ghost flipped upside down and gave Bob the finger, " I'm Tk, I'm a playah. Dont need ur pity wuss boy so beat it. ". Bob became infuriated, "You little iingrate. i was gona give you ur life back to full health, but now you will have to pay the penalty. " Bob extended his hands and chanted some italian disco , and Tk's ghost was thrown back to his body and lived again like a phoenix. Bob began to fade away with his parting words " I have given you the curse of immortal pain, you will never die but chances for being put into pain are now 500 times as likly ". } 

     { Tk got up and looked around and saw a small box off to the side, so he wnt to it. The box was labeled 'personality switcher'. He pressed the large red button on it and was suddenly shocked with 740000 volts of electricity then passed out for several hours. When he came to he no longer felt like a player, he felt more like himself... but there was a buzzard pecking around his groin area, pecking quite hard. He tried to shoo the bird away but it just took flight and started stabbing him in the head, causing blood to seep from open wounds. Tk had to run as fast as he could to nearest shelter, the local arcade. } 

     { So then Tk ran up to the entrance and shoved past ppl to get in, but he didnt see the bouncers in front of him. These guys in armani black are payd to keep out the riff raff and well if you saw a kid with torn up clothes and several bloody patches all over... you wouldnt see him as a prominent upstanding patron, so they acted accordingly. Tk sudenly realize hes bein lifted into the air and in the haze of pain and panic starts thrashing saying "lemme go damnit lemme go". The toughs haul his ass way back and send him soarin out onto the hard pavement, cutting up his face more and breaking his nose as he skids across the walk "and stay out ya'bum, proper attire only", and with a final spit n sneer shut the doors. } 

     { Then clouds started to rollin in, thunder andlightning crashing all over then a deluge of rain water soaked Tk all over. As he lay there battered and bruised, bleeding and cut up, with a vulture still pecking at certain soft spots.... his rapidly dying brain tried to figure out how this all happened... and suddenly he recalld that strange person Bob. In a jolt of anger he jumped up, smacked the vulture so hard it left a smeary black goo on the wall, and screamd outloud in the sky "Damn you Bob, what the hellare you doing to me?!"} 

     { In a sparkle of white and gold lights Bob appeared, looked at Tk, walked solemnly up to him and looked him right in the eye... and smacked him in the head with his right hand. Tk tumbled backward from the sudden hit and fell yet again hard on the ground on a sharp rock. } 

***** 

Lunarian- " Hmm, I should think of some better tortures for my little project, heh heh heh ". 

*Cue Cheezy Music*  
Can anyone think of better tortures?    Will people find this funny?    Will this be flamed into the ninth level of hell?    Will Little C get his revenge?    Yea find out nxt time. 


	4. ch4

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**

WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING

**  
  


     The following story/fic/fiction/gobbledegook will contain just about any poor taste in stories there is. We are talking : Mary sues, Self Insertion, Out Of Character, Fourth Wall Infractions, Plot Holes, Cliché's, Random Insanity, Weirdness, Attempts at humor, downright cruelty, possible hilarity, confusion, poor writing, bad grammar, typecasting, wish fulfillment, instantaneous ressurection. 

**The Scene- ** A Fusion Power Generator 

    The hallways are sleek and silver, long narrow hallways stretching out incredibly far. Every few minutes a couple of guards pass by on patrol, it's like a secret government installation with security. Security cameras sweep the hallway in large wide arcs, slowly analyzing everything in its sites. A small indestinguishable shadow slowly pears over a box in the corner, taking in the site. 

Little C- "Whoa, I never would have picked this place if I knew it was this heavily guarded. Oh well I'm here now, might as well get through with it. _This place better have enough energy to do what I need to._" 

    Little C puts his hands together and forms small glowing ball of energy in the gap within them. He waits untill the guards leave the immediate area before chucking it straight at the camera, disabling it temporarily with a static charge. Quickly, the little guy floats up and darts over to the otherside of the hall and hides within more boxes, so convenient those boxes just happen to be in strategic placements... 

Little C- "Oh boy, this is taking alot outta me, gotta regenerate... I think this will take longer then I thought." _I only hope Lunarian doesn't do anything he will regret..._

** The Scene-** A Dark Room ( The same as from earlier ) 

    Where once these meetings were calm and disciplined, they are now a solitary thread away from utter chaos. Members of the assembled group all frantically talking at once, trying to get out what they have to say before it is time again, time to go back into the torture. One member is noticeably more vocal and desperate then the rest, and this is easily seen from his constant shudders and strained voice laced with pain. 

?!?- "I can't stand this much longer! You guys have no idea what this is doing to me, the pain is unbearable!" 

?#?- "I'm sorry man, we are having a harder time getting any allies then expected, almost everyone is still insanely afraid of the repercussions if we are found out. I am working on extending our search into other dimensions." 

??- "Stay strong, you can survive this, I know you can." 

    The previous speaker reaches across to place their hand onto the suffering one's shoulder for reassurance, but he flinches away in fright. The attempt to console only leaves two hearts heavy with hurt and sadness. 

?!?- "I-I'm sorry.. I know you wouldn't do those things, but I can't help it. I'm going to be checked into a mental institution if this isn't stopped soon." 

    ??- "Don't lose hope." 

    ?@?- "Right, fight on!" 

    They all nod together and stand up, leaving the room with a renewed conviction. 

** The Scene-** Lunarian's room 

({({ AUTHOR NOTE })})  
I can't stand purposely writing badly, so spelling and grammer'll be normal from now on. Just pretend it's crappy.

Lunarian- " I got just the idea for a followup to that last injury. " 

    Lunarian does a standard evil guy cackle as he ponders on the fun he can have with Tk today. Actually, he had a little too much reddiwhip straight from the can and his cackle was about five times as psychotic then nine out of ten sociopaths. If one could look real closely, they could actually see a small sweatdrop forming on the computer screen. 

***** 

    {Takeru groand as he slowly picked himself back up off the ground, his sore and aching body protesting every solitary movement. Grimacing in agony after loosing strength in his arms and fell down face foward smashing his already brutalized face into the hard granite,Tk again cursed himself for getting out of bed this day. Suddenly it started pouring ran hard, a torrential downpour upon his body. Water seeping through his clothing and soaking to the bones. As he lie there gathering energy to rise, he didn't know how long, an hour-two-more?, his only companion the steady fall of rain.} 

    {Finally Tk felt ready to get up. Bracing his arms on the ground, he pushed up and weakly got on his knees looking up once more. A mistake, the gravel and dirt on his mouth mixed with rain and blood, dust and grime washed down from top of his hair and into his eyes. Tk shut his eyes quick but was too slow and the dust passed into his eyes. Immediately burning irritation assaulted his senses and he cried out loud in pain. Through tear filled eyes he searched for a nearby place to wash out his eyes, anything to cease the burning. It seems lady luck had finally shined on him, across the street was a gas station.} 

    {Blearily stumbling in a hop skip jump as fast as he could, Tk raced to the stations restroom only to find it locked. Cursing inwardly, he ran around to the office door and knocked quickly, dancing around in impatient torture, finally a hulk of a man, arms a foot thick had they been an inch, opened up. "Whad'ya want?", he said in a boom. Tk had faced down fearsome beasts without blinking, but this just wasn't his day. Tired, beaten, grungy and in pain, lessened his resolve as he felt quite small just then. "Please, I need to use your restroom!", begged Tk.} 

    {"Sure kid, here y'go", said the man, who if nametags are to be trusted was called 'Bucky'. Bucky handed over a cinder block, a pure 20 pound brick, with a 10 pound chain attached to it with the key. "Thank you sir", said Tk, trying to hurry things along to faster end the searing pain in his eyes. Just as Tk was rounding the corner, straining to not collapse dead under the weight, he heard the guy call out in a snicker, "Hey kid, better watch ye self in there." Puzzled by the strange warning, he gave the man a look as if to say 'What're you talkin about?', to which he just laughed harder. 

    {Using the key to unlock the door Tk quickly darted in looking for a sink. The first thing he noticed however was a full frontal assault on his nose coming from the toilet, then he inadvertently got a look at what was in it and could barely stop himself from throwing up. Large, beefy brownish black chunks were swimming in a murky thick greenish yellow liquid, he immediately shut his eyes and turned towards the sink.} 


End file.
